Jennifer’s Eulogy

This is August 25 2014. As some of you may know I’ve been living in Texas for a little over a year now with my wife, best friend and, best lover in all aspects. Married since 12~24~2013. But obviously the title plainly tells you what this post is. My favorite sister Jennifer Dawn Virgillo was murdered at some time last night back in New Jersey. She had a rough life. Homelessness, criminal actions, etc. But this said nothing about who she truly was. I’m not just writing nice things about because she has moved to the next plateau of life, existence, and consciousness. I’m writing it because she was a genuinely warm, caring, generous ,(no matter how little she had she gave what she could),. She loved her family. And I loved her just as much. When she felt like god didn’t like her for the things she had done I always made her feel like she had value, which she did. I told her god doesn’t care about her mistakes because she felt remorseful. I told her god would punish, torture, burn, or scald her for being the way god made her. This usual stopped her tears. The last conversation we had on that subject was days before I flew to Texas.  Be yourself I had told her. You’re honest about what you do. You don’t hide it like our other sister. The sister who did way worse. The sister that molested me at age 5. (You can read the post about how I feel about her). Anyway here is the eulogy I plan to read at her funeral/memorial. 

Jennifer’s Eulogy:
Jennifer was a good sister.
She always stood up for me me against those who were older and stronger when we we’re little kids.  Even if her friends made fun of me for a given reason she was right there.
She was right they the last time i hugged her, talked her and gave her a kiss on the cheek.
It was great spending time with her that entire week.
Talking about many things.
Drinking cheap beer, laughing, having so much fun before I flew away on the planes wings.
Now she’s gone from the physical world.
Living on the next plateau where light, colors and love swirl.
A place where our world has become nothing more than a dream.
A place where hardship and strife are replaced by rest and happiness are replaced by warmth from the creator, shot into every soul like a beam.

A wave of love, compassion, plus everything a being needs to begin true life in happiness supreme, beyond our conception.
Looking back at when she was in the flesh. She was loving to the point in which most have no comprehension.

Despite her flaws, which we all have and cannot judge.
She was sweet, generous, empathetic a fact no one can smudge.
She was also a good friend. She had a good laugh and a good heart.
The way her life senselessly came to end, tears us apart.

I know she went being herself, fighting as hard as she could.
Just as she fought through her time on Earth trying to reach the good.

As we must fight to remember who she really is.
A great person inside. Loving her family and kids.

It’s a struggle to think of all the good times.
We must in our minds bodies and souls let her memory sweetly chime.

It won’t be easy to stay positive in the face of our beloved Jennifer’s passing.
Try to picture the truth which is: She’s somewhere else relaxing.

Somewhere else yet still right here. Beside in a wondrous place. Invisible to us but very real.

She not only still exists in fact still forever with us.
She exists in our hearts. She’s loving us from inside. Loving her for infinity, we must.

Once we all cross in to that great, splendid unknown place.
She will be with the others we have known, smile on her face.

To quote a song from a film:
“In heaven everything is fine. in heaven everything is fine. In heaven everything is fine. You’ll have your good things and I’ll have mine.”

My good things include those I love.
They wait for us ubiquitous, all around us, everywhere we look, not just from above.

I miss and love you Jen, and even though you never met so does Deirdre. 

We will meet again. This is fact.



The 7th month, 30th day, of the year 2013. Was the day I saw the most beautiful site I have ever seen.
For the 2nd time that is. I was shaking like a tree full of leaves, as I walked around the column. We stopped. Frozen for a millisecond. Then we strode towards each other.  Hugging you in that loving hold I could have stood there forever, until we grew old. But that old ticking illusion of time kept at its grind. That day was the first day I truly saw the sun shine.
Here we are a year and a day later. The love has only grown.  To your every want and need I would love to cater. Still, through everything we’ve been through together. I feel deep within things will only get better. It’s just the 2nd act of OUR Origin.  If i had my way we would relive our life over and over, again and again. Just like throughout the entire history of human beings we have been.
I want to live the rest of our lives feeling the way we felt yesterday, increased exponentially everyday into the future and do so in the best most loving way.
Tonight we made our first soup together.  Which meant the world to me. A metaphor for life. A little of this and that. Adding spice. Spice.  To me you are the spice of my life. The spice Frank Herbert spoke of. The spice that expands consciousness to me it’s your love. If it weren’t for you I’d already be dead. But, “No!” you said. You breathed a new appreciation for all situations, and manifestations of whatever the universe brings.
Which is why on 12-24-14 we will celebrate the reasons we wear our rings.
I love you so so much.
No matter what may come. It doesn’t matter as long as I have you heart,mind, body, and soul to touch.